Signing My Life Away
The day I signed my legible signature on the off-white piece of computer paper and sent it with my visa paperwork to Ohio was not very memorable. In fact it seems long ago, in another time of life, another state of being. It was predictably a cool, cloudy Oregon day in October when I commuted 40 minutes to work at a pre-school as an Educational Assistant substitute. Although the details of the particular day are fuzzy in my mind, I can say with reasonable certainty that traveling to Japan to teach English was the superior alternative to my current position.
I do not regret that day, nor do I regret my sudden career shift. However, my career as a Sign Language Interpreter has since proven to be a suitable and even ideal choice and I am very sad to put it on the shelf for two years. You may be thinking, "Wait! I thought she just said she was an Educational Assistant sub?!" Yes, you're right. In fact, I am many things to many people and now I'm adding a new one: English Teacher. Is it so random? Conclude for yourself after you've read the whole story.
Currently I'm sitting on my bed in Oregon, a rented room with a single window to familiar American suburbia. I'm imagining the small details of life that will change very soon. Daily I wake with the sun streaming through the wooden blinds, sirens wailing in the distance, and the little Hispanic kids happily jumping on their trampoline across the fenceline. My roommate tends to open the back door and scare the cats out of her garden. In the summertime the smell of barbecued goodness wafts up into my open second floor window. I have a sore throat and stayed home from work today. Thankfully I feel good enough to attend my small group at church and say goodbye to my friends whom I have grown to love and appreciate the past year and a half. After some moving prayer and plenty of tears I commit their faces to memory, sure to store them in a permanent vault in my mind. Moments like these make the moving process more difficult and always pose the question: "Is this the right choice? Was I too rash and impulsive?" Each time I catch myself doubting I pull the old file from my vault, the one labeled "God's Promises."
It was 17 months ago when I drove down to Oregon for my interview, not nearly as nervous as I should have been. After chatting with my interviewers, answering questions and demonstrating my entry-level interpreting skills I drove back across the state line to Washington feeling good. More than good, I felt at peace. Peace has not come often in my life so when it washed over me like a fuzzy blanket in winter I knew this was not a feeling I imposed on myself. Inside, I knew I would get the job...I just KNEW it. I was a little surprised the following week when they called and said the position had been filled, but still I had that foreign peace that spoke to me, "you will get that job and move there." Sure enough, a few weeks later I received a frantic call from my new employer explaining that their recent hire had unexpectedly quit and I was their second choice. I moved to Oregon 4 days later. Without a place to live one of the interviewers graciously invited me to stay in the spare room usually rented out. Although it was meant to be temporary, I ended up staying there until, well, now. What can I say? Paying half the cost of what I would pay to live out in town, I couldn't afford to move out! Now that I had a steady job I began to save for my life's dream: a trip to Japan!
I didn't ask for much, just a small, 3 week trip to Tokyo with my Japanese friend I met in college. I kept my expenses (like rent) very low and was able to save enough to buy round trip airfare and have plenty of spending money to enjoy the vacation. I loved my job. I loved going to work everyday as an educational interpreter, collaborating with fellow teachers and interpreting professionals, and frequenting interpreting workshops to hone my skills and continue developing this vast career. I started making friends at church, joined the worship team, and had a plan to pay off my college loans within the year. Imagine my surprise when my boss suddenly called me in to her office and gave me 10 days notice of my lay-off. Teary-eyed, she explained to me the situation and apologized profusely, wishing there were some other option. As one who grew up in a home where my father received plenty of these notices, perhaps I was a bit jaded by the news. On the other hand, perhaps I had learned from watching my parents handle each situation with determination and dependence on a Higher Power. I walked out of the office suddenly enveloped in that comforting peace, soft words speaking to me, "I have orchestrated this. I will care for you. Do I not care for the birds and the lilys in the fields? You are much more precious to me!" The clouds overhead bubbled and brewed, dumping rain on my little car as it steadily drove me home underneath stray flashes of lightning in the sky. I mulled over the changes in my circumstance. According to the world I had every reason to be angry, upset, and frightened. My job was gone. My insurance was gone. My loan payment plan was gone. I might have to move away from my new friends. Then it hit: I wouldn't be able to afford a trip to Japan. The one thing I had yearned to accomplish for several years now seemed to be impossible. That's when I cried, giving the pouring rain a run for it's money. Was it such a thing to ask, Lord? I just want to go to Japan, experience the culture, eat the food, meet the people, see the country, hear the language. Is this request so unreasonable? Yet, despite the disappointment I had only one definite response: to praise God for His peace, His love, and His promises. I recommitted my future into His hands, reminding myself that my purpose on this earth is to serve Him and love others, going (or not going) where I am sent. Singing every worship song that came to mind in time with my windshield wipers, I praised Jesus all the way into my driveway where I finally parked the car and looked up at the gloomy sky. It parted now, and for a moment the clouds surrendered to reveal a rainbow above my house.
I was not forgotten.
To make a long story a little shorter, God did indeed provide for me. My boss put in good words for me and I was able to sub for them as an Ed Assistant. This work paid my bills and enabled me to stay in Hillsboro with my new friends and church family. I could pay the minimum on my loans, and an unexpected donar allowed me to continue taking Japanese classes. I joined the church worship team, community softball league, and formed a jazz band. I applied for an interpreting position in Indonesia but just barely made second place. Again, I felt the peace of God speaking, "I have something better! I promised."
Sure enough, I was soon hosting my best friends's bridal shower when I struck up a random conversation with a woman whose son was teaching English in Japan. Turns out I met this guy once...2 years ago. We had mutual FB friends so I messaged him and asked him for more information. I applied to the program the next day, gathering references and setting up a skype interview. The entire process was covered in prayer and I knew the moment I applied that this was where God wanted me. He multiplied my request! I said 3 weeks, He said 2 years. I said I want a little language before I go, He let me have almost 2 years at the college level so I'd be more comfortable when I arrive. I wanted to pay off my loans and have savings: my loans are paid, I have savings, and I'm getting PAID to go to Japan!
So, as things now stand I have said most of my goodbyes and am preparing to pack for my journey. I know there will be many adjustments and elements unforeseen that will pose as obstacles to overcome. Will I miss my friends here in Washington and Oregon? Absolutely. Will I miss my interpreting career that has only recently begun to blossom here in Portland? Without a doubt. Will I struggle in Japan, feel apprehensive about a new job description, and experience some degree of culture shock? Yes, yes, and yes. Do I have regrets about signing my life away? Not at all. My life was signed away the moment I decided to listen to that voice of peace inside my heart, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
I do not regret that day, nor do I regret my sudden career shift. However, my career as a Sign Language Interpreter has since proven to be a suitable and even ideal choice and I am very sad to put it on the shelf for two years. You may be thinking, "Wait! I thought she just said she was an Educational Assistant sub?!" Yes, you're right. In fact, I am many things to many people and now I'm adding a new one: English Teacher. Is it so random? Conclude for yourself after you've read the whole story.
Currently I'm sitting on my bed in Oregon, a rented room with a single window to familiar American suburbia. I'm imagining the small details of life that will change very soon. Daily I wake with the sun streaming through the wooden blinds, sirens wailing in the distance, and the little Hispanic kids happily jumping on their trampoline across the fenceline. My roommate tends to open the back door and scare the cats out of her garden. In the summertime the smell of barbecued goodness wafts up into my open second floor window. I have a sore throat and stayed home from work today. Thankfully I feel good enough to attend my small group at church and say goodbye to my friends whom I have grown to love and appreciate the past year and a half. After some moving prayer and plenty of tears I commit their faces to memory, sure to store them in a permanent vault in my mind. Moments like these make the moving process more difficult and always pose the question: "Is this the right choice? Was I too rash and impulsive?" Each time I catch myself doubting I pull the old file from my vault, the one labeled "God's Promises."
It was 17 months ago when I drove down to Oregon for my interview, not nearly as nervous as I should have been. After chatting with my interviewers, answering questions and demonstrating my entry-level interpreting skills I drove back across the state line to Washington feeling good. More than good, I felt at peace. Peace has not come often in my life so when it washed over me like a fuzzy blanket in winter I knew this was not a feeling I imposed on myself. Inside, I knew I would get the job...I just KNEW it. I was a little surprised the following week when they called and said the position had been filled, but still I had that foreign peace that spoke to me, "you will get that job and move there." Sure enough, a few weeks later I received a frantic call from my new employer explaining that their recent hire had unexpectedly quit and I was their second choice. I moved to Oregon 4 days later. Without a place to live one of the interviewers graciously invited me to stay in the spare room usually rented out. Although it was meant to be temporary, I ended up staying there until, well, now. What can I say? Paying half the cost of what I would pay to live out in town, I couldn't afford to move out! Now that I had a steady job I began to save for my life's dream: a trip to Japan!
I didn't ask for much, just a small, 3 week trip to Tokyo with my Japanese friend I met in college. I kept my expenses (like rent) very low and was able to save enough to buy round trip airfare and have plenty of spending money to enjoy the vacation. I loved my job. I loved going to work everyday as an educational interpreter, collaborating with fellow teachers and interpreting professionals, and frequenting interpreting workshops to hone my skills and continue developing this vast career. I started making friends at church, joined the worship team, and had a plan to pay off my college loans within the year. Imagine my surprise when my boss suddenly called me in to her office and gave me 10 days notice of my lay-off. Teary-eyed, she explained to me the situation and apologized profusely, wishing there were some other option. As one who grew up in a home where my father received plenty of these notices, perhaps I was a bit jaded by the news. On the other hand, perhaps I had learned from watching my parents handle each situation with determination and dependence on a Higher Power. I walked out of the office suddenly enveloped in that comforting peace, soft words speaking to me, "I have orchestrated this. I will care for you. Do I not care for the birds and the lilys in the fields? You are much more precious to me!" The clouds overhead bubbled and brewed, dumping rain on my little car as it steadily drove me home underneath stray flashes of lightning in the sky. I mulled over the changes in my circumstance. According to the world I had every reason to be angry, upset, and frightened. My job was gone. My insurance was gone. My loan payment plan was gone. I might have to move away from my new friends. Then it hit: I wouldn't be able to afford a trip to Japan. The one thing I had yearned to accomplish for several years now seemed to be impossible. That's when I cried, giving the pouring rain a run for it's money. Was it such a thing to ask, Lord? I just want to go to Japan, experience the culture, eat the food, meet the people, see the country, hear the language. Is this request so unreasonable? Yet, despite the disappointment I had only one definite response: to praise God for His peace, His love, and His promises. I recommitted my future into His hands, reminding myself that my purpose on this earth is to serve Him and love others, going (or not going) where I am sent. Singing every worship song that came to mind in time with my windshield wipers, I praised Jesus all the way into my driveway where I finally parked the car and looked up at the gloomy sky. It parted now, and for a moment the clouds surrendered to reveal a rainbow above my house.
I was not forgotten.
To make a long story a little shorter, God did indeed provide for me. My boss put in good words for me and I was able to sub for them as an Ed Assistant. This work paid my bills and enabled me to stay in Hillsboro with my new friends and church family. I could pay the minimum on my loans, and an unexpected donar allowed me to continue taking Japanese classes. I joined the church worship team, community softball league, and formed a jazz band. I applied for an interpreting position in Indonesia but just barely made second place. Again, I felt the peace of God speaking, "I have something better! I promised."
Sure enough, I was soon hosting my best friends's bridal shower when I struck up a random conversation with a woman whose son was teaching English in Japan. Turns out I met this guy once...2 years ago. We had mutual FB friends so I messaged him and asked him for more information. I applied to the program the next day, gathering references and setting up a skype interview. The entire process was covered in prayer and I knew the moment I applied that this was where God wanted me. He multiplied my request! I said 3 weeks, He said 2 years. I said I want a little language before I go, He let me have almost 2 years at the college level so I'd be more comfortable when I arrive. I wanted to pay off my loans and have savings: my loans are paid, I have savings, and I'm getting PAID to go to Japan!
So, as things now stand I have said most of my goodbyes and am preparing to pack for my journey. I know there will be many adjustments and elements unforeseen that will pose as obstacles to overcome. Will I miss my friends here in Washington and Oregon? Absolutely. Will I miss my interpreting career that has only recently begun to blossom here in Portland? Without a doubt. Will I struggle in Japan, feel apprehensive about a new job description, and experience some degree of culture shock? Yes, yes, and yes. Do I have regrets about signing my life away? Not at all. My life was signed away the moment I decided to listen to that voice of peace inside my heart, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.